When Borrowing My Money, Ask Please

As a cheap bastard, which can be confirmed by all my ex's and friends, I knew something was up the second my Washington Mutual account seemed to dip slightly.  I sensed that, despite copious Christmas shopping and an uncontrolled binging fest of magazines, starbucks and shit food at the airport while waiting for six hours after I missed my flight (fuck the TWU), something was afoot.  And since I check my checking account balance about twice a day, it was inevitable I would find out that someone had stolen my debit card information.

The first clue was a charge to iFriends.com, a porno site.  It's conceivable that this was mine.  In a depressed, drunk bender, it is completely reasonable that I would have paid for a membership to Sean Cody or some other "straight" guys fucking each other site.  But then I checked iFirends.  Straight porno, like jizz on titties kind of thing.  Which, is just gross.

And then charges to McAfee.com started to pop up which is, ironically, an Internet security software company.  So i called iFriends and the told me that whoever made the account with them had my phone number, address, card number and security pin.  Awesome.  However, the fucker who created the account used the email address quinnell.ben@gmail.com

So everyone, please let quinnell.ben@gmail.com know that he is a total prick.  This is probably a dummy account, but go ahead, send him a couple of emails telling him to fuck off and die.

In the end, I had to cancel my card, which has basically cut me off from having cash for the last week.  The charges will be reimbursed to my account sometime next week.  But I'm still pissed that Ben Quinnel would take my money.  I mean, I'm broke as shit.  At least take money from someone who has it.  Or even better, someone who has parents who gives them money.  Or who have a trust fund.  You know, Manhattanites.